Porcelain Eyed Promise

There was a cliff
that was always there
long before he sat a foot here
on the rocks.
And this man decided to pay a visit,
desperate,
he was standing there
was broken to pieces
had nowhere to go.
No one was able to
keep up with the voices in his head.
His only real voice echoed in empty rooms,
and never reached an ear
so he came here.
And there he stood
screaming out onto the open water
in a last attempt to get heard.
His voice drowned by waves
hitting the shore.
The wind
blew his hat away.

And he took a step to the edge
to get his voice better heard
over the sounds of the storming see.
He got closer.
Rocks crumbled down the slope.
Eventually close enough
that a last step
would mean never coming back.
And there he stood,
lost and alone for an eternity.
Torn to give up
just let himself fall
let his skull get pierced by sharp,
knife like rock formations
and his blood spill into the blue sea
into purple stripes.
He looked down and he didn’t care.
Nothing to care about anymore
or if he was honest even before.
About to jump.
A whisper;
State of tonic immobility;
A rock, falling sound.
He turns around
Am I not alone anymore?
But he was.
Just a mannequin,
nothing like them.
She is real.
Lifelike eyes
– life like
never before seen
by any guy able to comprehend in words what he has crossed eyes with.
and he can’t either.
And the man talks and he talks
and she doesn’t bother to listen
but she doesn’t tell him
to shut the fuck up either,
but sometimes he could swear
he could hear her mumble “idiot”
under the sound of blowing wind,
heading from the sea for the cliff.
I feel mentally ill for you,
he tells her,
and he pushes her away.
And the dummy still held a smile,
like he never said or did anything.
So he went away
believing he could make it far
but return one day
as soon he gets his hat back
as soon as he can.
But in every shop display
he got reminded again
of the mannequin standing on the edge of the cliff.
And one day he comes back.
Feels ready to tell her
about himself again.
But she isn’t standing there anymore.
Someone took her
and the robber didn’t search for a deeper moral
didn’t wish for a meaningful life
but used his wit, his strength, his time, his charm
to make a wife out of the mannequin.
Maybe instead of going after yourself,
and you kinda know it,
“you should just have taken a chance, man”.
Good bye, you beautiful
full of love and life mannequin
I lost my mind for you and got it back
and you broke your doll shell.
“Be fuckin’ happy”,
as we would have said.
I can live without you
even on a cliff
But how dares the universe
to put someone like you in my path
and not make her
want to be with me.

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