Floating with the waves Ŵٲعᚱᗠᦹ

Best case
I am the bad example
so you see a different guy
in a better light
that is what I was meant to be
and with a small chance your blinds
lift one day, not scarred.
Worst case, I venture out there alone
completely fail at myself
and feel miserable for the rest of my life
even if I get all that I had wished for.
Great view for tomorrow
but humble I say
“I am not scarred”.
I would apologize to you.
what it brought to you that
I had to do that
so I wouldn’t stop fighting.
And after all,
self-deprecation
is how I keep myself grounded in reality.
I would haved loved talking to you,
floating on the waves
but I saw people drown.
I am not safe.