Unnecessary long explanations

Oh fuck
my birth certificate
got me again
Surnames
linked with childhood trauma.
carry it
like an invitation to
brash behavior
That’s why
it’s always good
when you’re looking
at her
like at
the woman
you’re supposed
to be with.
easier
to share
that she wants
to go out with you,
can endure
on Saturdays
I saw these
people again
and I had,
with them
no relationship
which was based on
who I am
just on
what I was on about
at that
particular
time.
You can think out loud
that I was
not changed
you’re right
about
some sides
they usually endure
but there are
people sitting there
who only carry
good memories
of me.
but the only
thing that’s really
resilient
over time
about the boy
that they described
what’s left
is that he’s still
weird
and with pleasure
stays alone
but now prefers
how his feelings
tear
themselves apart
in front of him.
at least he knows
how to raise his voice
From my
point of view
trying to distance
myself from him:
He’s just
ashamed
of himself
right now.
nightly costume change  prove
cry boy
is only his alter
ego.
The only fight
in his life
– freedom
found in what
he is willing
to sacrifice.
No wonder he
needs you
to hold onto
his dwindling life
made up of words
So, are we going out
again
or not?