Decision to Interact

I draw
this time in sand
they lead nowhere
they have no end
they lead around
me; never cross
just circle outside
orbit like flies
the torso of a dead horse
like a planet
like a star
around the universe
its center
should be formally me
arrogant to think
self aware
that’s not good
but how broken
can you be
if you aren’t first?
I am not your mother, your father
your brother
I am not trying to be.
I have few left
pathetic cause
for a lot of my troubles
nobody cares
just another body
to throw into the boiler of the machine
keep the
flickering flame
Sometimes I wish it would just get blown out
I am not proud,
but I fight with myself
that’s not a fight I have to have
with anyone
of you…naturally
except if I feel like it that day
and I want to.

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