I wanted to her to be my family,
because I don’t think
I need more than her.
Sure maybe she thinks
I don’t know what I get into
can’t foresee the horror or craziness
I am about to witness.
Like she needs to be an angel
to stand beside the devil.
Hell is other people,
and it is more fun to rule the fact and laugh
than to stand beside acting all concerned.
Has the time come to cleanse myself of the make believe?
She protects herself
from my loose mouth
it hurts more than falling in a pit of needles
and the fact that I want her so bad
is exactly what draws her away.
I can’t express my feelings differently
like a snake charmer that got bitten on his first try
I shy away.
And to be honest
and I honestly believe that
there is nothing more pathetic
than a boy
to a girl
over the age of 15.